get it all out
rip it out remove it
don't be alarmed
when the wound begins to bleed
cause we're so scared to find out
what this life's all about
so scared we're going to lose it
not knowing all along
that's exactly what we need
and today I will trust you with the confidence
of a man who's never known defeat
but tomorrow, upon hearing what I did
I will stare at you in disbelief
oh, inconsistent me
crying out for consistency
and you said I know that this will hurt
but if I don't break your heart then things will just get worse
If the burden seems too much to bear
Remember
the end will justify the pain it took to get us there
and I'll let it be known
at times I have shown
signs of all my weakness
but somewhere in me
there is strength
and you promise me
that you believe
in time I will defeat this
cause somewhere in me
there is strength
and today I will trust you with the confidence
of a man who's never known defeat
and I'll try my best to just forget
that that man isn't me
reach out to me
make my heart brand new
every beat will be for you
for you
and I know you know
you touched my life
when you touched my heavy heart and made it light
i was gonna write tonight. cause its been a while. but i just didn't feel like it. lots to say... all the time.. but just can't get it down. maybe my mind likes to keep all my thoughts and ideas inside.. cause it knows the words i write wont justify the things that happen to me, the things i see and think and wonder. i wish sometimes i could press record in my mind and it would print out a blog for me. cause its really good. sometimes. i have lots of mini thoughts that just dont ever seem to form one big idea. or enough to write a blog. maybe i'll just start writing one liners in here. but then i may as well just get twitter already haha. i find trying in blogs unattractive, but then not caring at all always seems to look like trying... even worse than actual trying. so i dont know. gimme a couple days. for the few (or two) that actually read this... that have probably stopped cause i haven't posted something in a month or so. try and stick with me.
i got in my car tonight and got this song in my head. (see above) that happens alot. thats how i choose what i listen to. first song that comes to my mind when i get in my car. tonight it was let it all out by relient k. i love it and its almost too perfect for whats going on in my life right now. (aka. GOD) I love Him. He's like my personal DJ.
ps. dont skim through the words. its actually good. and meaningful. and could be for you. and its not a lazy post. it started out as one but it isn't now. :)
4 comments:
I feel the exact same way Richelle. Too much to say, not sure how to say it, not even sure if I want to post it. Sometimes it's hard being vulnerable! My mind has become so boggled lately that I can't put in words what I'm feeling. It's good to know someone else is struggling the same way :) By the way, I love that song... it's gotten me through a few hard times in life.
Love you!
I'm still following your blog!
make that 3 people who consistently follow!
i remember when i was living in sydney in '05 with 6 flatmates and shared a room with nikki.. the one day she was bitching to the max about something when all of a sudden the ipod (which we had attached to speakers) randomly pipes up.. "let it all out..." and we both just kinda looked at each other and burst out laughing.. needless to say this song saved me from hearing an earful! ultra good lyrics
Richi, I have so seen your strength in an even greater measure in the last few weeks / months with all that has happened in this season we're in! I'm inspired by the fact that you haven't given up, even though you've had countless opportunity and reason to do so. And I'm inspired by the way God has come through for you as you've persevered. I so love that I get to do this journey with you!
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